Bobby Jenks, Girly Gripes and Tweets From the One and Oney

Dawg,

Is a man a pussy if he talks shit on Twitter like Oney Guillen? Should Bobby have tweeted back?

It used to be a man got mad face-to-face, but in this new age every Chris Brown is tweeting gripes from the comfort of his marble coated hot tub.

Teddy, if that's the case I have a few gripping tweets to tweet about Grady Little, Kobe Bryant, CC Fatbathia or even Lindsay Lohan not being in that Pornopic anymore about Linda Lovelace.

Also, is the Celtics’ season ovah? –O’Donnell in Weymouth

O’D,

When I was a young whippersnapper a twit was kind of a weakling or a British guy. As in "Get a load of that British twit wearing sandals at a baseball game." Now, it's something on my grandkid’s phone.

I have read some twits, and people tell me I have a Twitter account. Someone from my empire must maintain it, because I have no earthly idea what the hell it is. Seems like random people writing random things about their boring lives. Most of the people are losers, trying to get someone to retweet their idiotic thoughts.

Some people do things like this: #Gerbilinjetersass - and I don't get how that works either. They tell me it's a hash; again, hash was something totally different when Tedsicle was younger. Either it was something you ate at a truck stop or smoked with Butch Hobson in the restroom of the truck stop. Also, it's UnAmerican to complain or gripe about pornography. Give Lindsay a few months and you'll be seeing her beautiful ginger freckled sweater knobs on the screen before you can say Mean Girls.

A man is a wussy who gripes in a Tweet.

Bobby should have called Ozzie’s barber and bribed him to give the ol' manager a Hitlerstache like MJ. Now that would have #shushed Oney up quick.

The Cs will be fine. Once Rondo’s ankle reheals, he’ll come back to lead the team on another huge win streak. A couple of those streaks, Perkins gets out of his cheermoni suit and then the playoffs are here. A rested Garnett returns to the court to start pulling the cancer card on every role playing big man and Dawg is recounting his rings from the comfort of this cold, frozen mountain in Chechnya.

Have faith, be good and go Red Sox. -Dawg