Cream of Ass?

Dawg, What kind of cream is Andy rubbing on his ass to make this happen? -Sully

Hi All,

Some of you may not know that I do some side work for the government and as part of my work I am exposed to a lot of different medications to make us stronger, faster, bullet proof able to fly and sometimes might even give us x-ray vision.  It has come to my attention that 54 year old Andy Pettitte is making a comeback with the Yankees.  Some of you remember Pet-it from his steroid using ass getting caught.  Of course, he also took a little time to throw his best friend, Roger Clemens under the bus on his way out.  Now, after spending time with his family, who must be real assholes by the way, Pettite is coming back to the Yankees.  I imagine that Andy had to do some soul searching, or he decided he hates his kids and his wife is starting to look ugly...Whatever it was, he's coming back.  Apparently he's throwing 99mph and doesn't need any days off in between starts either.  I'm not implying that he used his time away from baseball to inject himself with Horse Steroids...But, I mean, he did right?
I'm sure "Andy's Journey" is inspiring other recently (and not so recently) athletes to consider a come back.

All I know is, I saw Eck in the NESN bathroom with a needle hanging out of his hairy ass...

Dawg