Dawg, I'm worried about Clooney spending time in prison after being arrested today while protesting some country I never heard of called Sudan. Also, what's the deal with Crawford's wrist?  -Worried in Worcester

Dear Worried,

Yeah, looking like he does, he'd be in big trouble in the clink if he went to normal people prison.  However, celebrities like George Clooney, Butch Hobson and Don Orsillo go to special prison with their own iPads, large screen tv's and 24 hr servants.  If they let a sweetheart like Clooney into standard lock up, he'd cause a riot between suitors fighting for his womanly services.  Let's just say he'd have more than salt and pepper in his hair before his time was up.

Crawford is "nearly ready to hit" according to Bobby V.  So I guess he'll be in the lineup just in time for June 31st...unless they want to hold him back for the All Star Break, so maybe late August, just in time for the playoff run.  It will be really hard to replace that .255 average in the lineup and tremendous one-hop defensive skills we saw last year.  I'm starting to think Crawford is possibly a Buddhist since he's afraid of injuring a baseball - he doesn't want to hit it with his bat or catch it with his glove.  He's also sure not to throw it too hard from the outfield, as it might have a panic attack on its way into the infield. 

Seriously? I think he'll be ready by May, and will finally put up some decent numbers. 

Hugs,
Dawg